Dear Blog,

Well today I cannot find my first blog anywhere so it makes it difficult to maintain continuity. This is what happens to leaner bloggers- sigh.

I recollect I was previously burlbling about Fading after a Certain Age - fading as in people no longer 'seeing' you as a human being- you becoming invisible with age once passed that awful midway mark. And it seems to me that when people get to 70 they are almost invisible and by 80 they don't exist to the mainstream world at all. Mind you, having said that I have read that 50 is the new 40, so perhaps I shouldnt get too screwed up yet. Although for men apparently 40 is the new 50, which was the new 40. I can go with that- although in my previous blog I did venture that getting older was easier for men as they could play at being the Older Man- whereas being the Older Woman is still a difficult call. This is because men can get away with wrinkles and some sagging ( not too much mind) whereas women can't. Men can grow beards to cover up double chins, whilst women cant. Well perhaps thats not quite true either nowadays 'cos apparently some women have testosterone supplements to help them keep sharp and aggressive, and if they get the wrong ones their voices can deepen and they can grow moustaches etc!!

Apparently they take them because women lose most of their natural testosterone by the time they are in their 30s and it affects their abilities to work hard and play hard in a mans world. (Perhaps I should try some - of the right stuff of course? I definately am not as sharp as I used to be. And my brain has gone- where to I am not quite sure but its a real nuisance when you start a sentence and have forgotten the ending before you get there.......).

Anyway to get back on track- perhaps because of all this disparity in ageing and peoples' perceptions women work harder at maintaining themselves, whilst men dont give a bugger and fade quicker. Which is why the Midlife Crisis age could still be 40 for men. I dont know.......what do you think?

I do know though that men generally start snoring after 40. My dear other half started snoring at around 40. He's a bit older than little moi. So, now I dont get many restful nights sleep ( perhaps that's why my brain has gone- sleep deprivation is a form of torture is it not?). When he's home he snores and so does one of our two dogs. They also sleep in the bedroom ( but not on the bed ) with us cos when my husband is away I dont sleep well on my own in our big empty old house, so I let them upstairs for company. I can mostly cope with one loudly snoring dog over the other side of the bedroom. As they get very upset and bark all night if shut downstairs when Husband returns we let them upstairs when he's back. So, I am sure you can picture the scenario - I end up with loud snoring, in stereo - one source being right next to my face. Bad news. No sleep. I am sure they are in competition with one another- see who can snore the loudest. The snoring dog by the way is only a little one- so I guess on the basis of bodyweight she wins paws down.

I am not the only sufferer of snoring men- most of my friends- also of this Certain age- have Snoring Husbands. Many have tried to get their men to effect cures- with vaying success- from the elbow in the side, to more expensive laser treatment to the soft palate to the extremes of air masks to Be Worn In Bed ( very sexy...........!!!) .... Otherwise its the spare bedroom, or earplugs of course!!

Life, as you can see, does not get attractive as you get older. By the way one of the main causes of Mid Life Snoring is weight gain - especially around the chops- so the advice to you guys to help you maintain your allure as you get older and start to gently Fade is to keep the weight down, down, down..........so if any of you in your 30's happen to be reading this be warned - keep your weight down to ensure no snoring and that you have a bright and breezy partner who gets a good nights sleep; otherwise you'll end up with a crabby sleep deprived wreck- like me! Or an empty bed in the morning..........very sad.

There are many other things that go awry after a Certain Age. But I shall continue these at another time as I must get on now. So bye Blog for today.